One might think that a climbing destination with a single short pitch can hardly yield a decent workout. Said one would not have visited Scuffy's Redwood Terror.

We begin with a lesson from the host and master:

Holding the La Sportiva Enduros, tools of choice for the evening:

And move on to the demonstration in the intimate setting:

He makes it look easy. It is not easy. I heard murmurings of "harder than Cream." I wouldn't know because the only cream I found was the skin of my ankles, knees, and hands mashed to a pulp in a Herculean effort to keep from spitting out. And I am not yet worthy: I cheated. I pulled on the toggle bolts way inside... let's just pretend they were tube chocks I set and it's fair game? I guess there's no penalty if the ref didn't see it.

Here's Rob proving that Gaston is not the move of choice, and Gary with the helpful beta pointing which way to go:

Then there's Gary, with an unfair advantage of having his own hideous crack machine:
Getting that knee up high past the first roof is a key:

Oh, sweet pain and suffering!

But he does that hand-stack like a pro:

And wrastle's past that second roof and into the switching-sides maneuver:

Is that a foot-knee stack? Oh, the insanity!

Well, it worked for him:


Fortunately, there were no pictures of my grimacing. I applied Brute Force for the first panel, and was dead after clearing the first roof. Had a good no-hands rest off a thigh-torque to recover, and touched the glorious top after a few questionable moves that spoiled the OW purity. But it was a much better showing than my trip earlier in the year where I couldn't clear the first roof.


I did spent about 10 minutes with my head between my legs trying not to vomit when I got down. I asked which bushes were OK to spew in. I think I might be allowed back some day because I managed to hold it in. But it was close. I was worked. One lap was enough for me. Gary and Scuffy eat that stuff up, and did a few laps each. I guess it's good to have some heroes to look up to.

Epilogue:

It is day 20 since the encounter, and my hand scab that was the size of a nickel is healing nicely. It went through several rounds of infection and misguided soakings/rippings, but yesterday the scab finally brushed off to reveal pink raw skin beneath, and no puss to speak of. Just in time to rough it up tonight.