First off, I want to write a public apology for the supertopo books.... I never

have owned one (till now), always thought they were stupid and over kill, but

to each his own. A book can't climb the route, nor can Chris and Bird give all

the beta, and in fact sometimes is just wrong, which makes the whole supertopo

thing useless anyways. I like the fact they put in so much free climbing,

hopefully to spread apart some of the crowds off the big 5 (moonlight,

touchstone, etc) and also to Mike Anderson. I don't agree with him on many

issues, including some items in the book, but he is a hard man and what him and

Rob have done in the park is a great achievement. Anyways, just wanted to make

it clear that I do have strong feelings about items and I let my mouth write

things before I truly process them.

Swoop Gimp

I haven't wall climbed in well over 4 years. The last route that I did was the

FA of Silverback in the Temple with Flyn Brian. I stopped climbing got really

fat, just kinda had given up after my injuries.



So last week I dusted off the ole credit card and bought some wall gear,

thought it was time. God we need a lot of crap for this dance huh? Anyways, I

had been on Swoop twice before. Once many moons ago with a guy named Josh and

we tried a one day, got royally spanked and came down. The 2nd time I meet this

guy who wanted to just jumar, perfect I thought, beats soloing! Our first wall

together he was cleaning the first pitch, a sideways 5.6 leaner, decides

instead of lowering off a cam to the anchor and retrieving it on the next

pitch, that he could just walk across the slab. I assured him that if Chris

Sharma climbed slab as good as he can pull on limestone, no way in hell he

could do it but bigwall'n Bob had other plans. He took one step, slipped, and

rockets at mock 3 across the wall breaking his ankle really bad. Bob is a

really good guy and great partner he ended up getting drug up Ball and Chain in

a day, some new routes, and the Zodiac in a day, all jugging just chasin me.

Really good guy. So anyways, I needed to get this route done.

I left Vegas after school at around 9pm. I was so stoked and nervous to get

back on a wall, but I needed it. I stopped for some 5 hour energy shots in St.

George, and was in the park faster than I could think. I has gotten a permit to

drive into the canyon so I was parked and getting out of my scrubs and into my

climbing apparel before I had time to think. I threw on my pack that was so

fu*king heavy, and did the river crossing dance at 1 in the morning. I thought

I knew the trail to the base, god was I wrong! About 2 hours later of the Zion

scramble to get to the base I started racking gear, flaking ropes, and started

freeing the first pitch. All went well as is should, and then came the second

pitch. This pitch is one of the coolest on the route. A splitter on an

overhanging wall for 160ft. All on small brass with the occasional cam or

bigger nut. Since it was dark I had no pictures of the pitch so sorry Chris I

am stealing one of yours.



I couldn't believe how fast the pitch went for me. I didn't have a watch but I

thought for sure it would have been a 3 or 4 hour job since I haven't climbed

in so long. I rapped down got my bag off the anchor and was wondering why the

sun wasn't coming up. I took off on the next pitch which continues along the

same splitter for a ways (I think it's the crux of the whole route bad brass

etc) to a ladder that cuts left. A few bad bolts to some really cool hooks to

the belay. As I rapped off the sun was just coming up. Not bad I thought for a

fat guy.



I cast off on the hooking pitch, which on those kinds of hooks you can move

quickly and even take pics while on them



This pitch is a quick one, rapped and cleaned. From the topo, I thought I was

in there, all C1 5.9, 6 more to go, I am in like flinn, even thought I could

make it before dark.


Boy was I wrong...


I started up the pitch then as I got higher the crack got wider. I got in the

slot, but with no pro I freed up in my Madrock Appraoch shoes, and before I

knew it I was way out above my pro and falling out of the slot. I placed a

hook on a really hollow flake and fell on it with a my daisy attached! It held!

I unpumed myself and finished the pitch taking everything out of me and over 3

hours to lead. It finshed on a really cool ledge.



Started off leading pitch 6 after a ten minute break on the ledge ate half a

cliff bar, one shot of 5 hour, and listened to some Manson on the Ipod. Chris

Mac said t he next pitch is 5.8 fun to a 5.9 fun OW. I was totally expecting

clowns and ballons since it was so much "FUN". Well if loose Zion rock and

weird gear are fun, you will be in heaven. It really was fun, I was just

totally cooked at this point, and I ran out of water, I was a barrel of laughs

at this point. The beauty of soloing is there is no rope drag, so I just

linked 6/7 together which doing as a team would be a nightmare. Now the last

pitch...


I was so cooked at this point, I looked up and saw the 5.7R section and said

what the FU*K! If this is 5.7 I will slap my mom right now, I got up on top of

this little tower and reached up to the big jugs that seemed to be glued to

kitty litter. I did the nice lock off throw and my lead line was stuck! I had

to reverse the death fall free the line and start over. I think a tear fell

from my eyes at this point and the phrase I fu*king hate this. I re did the

drop knee Egyptian campus throw lock off thing, then started up about 20 feet

off the tower which is 10 feet off this ledge. If you fall your tib and fib

will come rocketing threw your knee caps for sure! I started getting the

dreaded arm locks (were your arm locks in the bent position) and I was going to

fall. There is a really big bush on the ledge I contemplated jumping for it to

soften the landing, then I just said at least break your bones trying you

puss. I stood up ditched for a side pull and slammed in a cam and just

weighted it. Glad it held. I finished the pitch and was relived I only had

350ft of 4th to go.





I decided to leave the rack and bag at the belay and I soloed to the top with

the ropes on my back. I got to the top and rapped back in put the rack and bags

on my back and jugged out. I topped out just after the sun set, and was so

happy that I pulled it off. Now just a quick walk down...


I was going to rap Moonlight, but thought it was a total dick thing to do with

parties on the wall, so I walked. I made it down and the tram dropped me off at

my truck. Drove to St. George and slept for a few then back home to Vegas. It

was a great trip, great route, just wish I was lightning like my bros Ammon and

Chris.